INTIMATE ARTS

Because Everyone Has A Story

Here's Mine

I Thought I was Done

Yet here I am at another beginning.

Early 2020 I caught the vision of Xochitl.love and started creating this website.  I had an awesome bio for this page, the classic story of  triumph over my overwhelming life as an orthodox Mormon homeschooling housewife and mother of 8. Finding fortune, friends, adventures, lovers… (For the curious folk, you can read it here. It’s a good story!)

Years later I am not here to tell you how successful and amazing my life is so you will want to be my client.

I am not done with my story.  I wasn’t then and I am not now.

I am here to tell you that I failed to launch that website.  I failed to launch a career that gave me all the money and freedom and happiness I could ever need or want. I made a HUGE leap of faith and fell flat on my face.

And the days and years since have been about picking myself up, over and over. Looking at my bruised and battered face again and again and choosing love.

Walking through the most terrifying corridors of my inner being, courageously clinging to faith that the light inside me would shed love on whatever was lurking there.  Humbly learning how to forge a gentle path for the divinity inside to express itself.

I’ve learned that the triumphs I could overemphasize to get attention from clients are fleeting.  They come and they go in a breath.  But the deep hum of inner satisfaction from knowing and loving myself is living water, a fountain of youth. I truly live an ecstatic life, and I am passionate about helping others find that hum.

I have gained and lost money, weight, friends, jobs, clients, relationships. Lots of opinions. Most recently, my mom.

And  I have lost myself in various sideroads of bypass, codependency, and other people’s dogma.

What I have to offer is that I am ALIVE. That I choose this existence wholeheartedly. That my personal experiences of triumph and failure contribute to a wisdom that emanates a field of love, magnetizing those who need refreshment and guidance as they traverse their own dark tunnels.  That I can witness and honor a person’s truth without interfering with their own mastery.

What’s alive for me right now?  I live part time in a small bedroom community in the foothills of Utah county with husband and kids and part time in the ridiculous but charming SLC suburb called Daybreak. I love the challenge of maintaining flow and satisfaction and good humor amidst the constant interruptions, chaos, and trials of a large family, my partner’s family, and my soul tribe.  I love homemaking, nature, animals, babies, and  beautiful art, poetry, and music.  (I love the edgy, bawdy and inappropriate stuff too).

Each of us is a Glorious work in progress

There's A Hum of the Ecstatic beyond the Trial and Triumph

Finding the Bread of Life through Eating the Shadows

The Power lies in Honoring what is alive Right Now

I am steady and flowing like a river. I can endure like a mountain until it is time to crumble into fertile soil.  I hold both the warmth and passion of fire. The wind and I rush through each other, laughing and weeping with ease and fullnes.

And when I sit with clients I see the rainbows and snowflakes and sunsets in their stories. I adore the goblins and shades and grim things there too. A channel of love opens, and a container of softness and inspiration is created where people can safely stretch into their own unknown.

And I Am Left Humbled By It All.